question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
