If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
Randomize
