his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize
