Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
Randomize
