The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
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