piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Randomize
