We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
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