I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
I always "accidentally" drop a condom and make sure she sees it's a magnum. By the time I'm inside her and she realizes how small I am, it's all over in a flash and I'm done. Plus, they never call back so I never have to see the girl ever again. #gratefulforprematuretinypenis
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
