I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
kristin has been a bad kristin
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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