quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
