I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
