I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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