My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize