her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
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