I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize
