what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
Randomize
