ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Randomize