I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
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