id be glad to
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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