butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
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