The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
