he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Randomize
