You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
