it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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