you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
Randomize
