One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
I'm at about main and main street
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
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