Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
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