By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Randomize
