I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
vagina is talking i cant
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Randomize
