there was a trapeze. enough said
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
Still dying that you shit outside
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
