we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
jump out the window naked night went bad
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Randomize
