you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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