what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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