It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Pants are for mortals
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
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