I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize