I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
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Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
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Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.