He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize
