I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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