I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Randomize
