New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
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