susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
