how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Randomize
