The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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