Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
Drunk walkin through police station. America
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
Randomize
