My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Randomize
