i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize
