thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Randomize
