i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
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