In the future we'll all be gay
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
