If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
A bitchslap is in order.
Randomize